There are people in the world who actually think that you can get pneumonia because “the nurses wouldn’t put enough blankets on him.”
It’s a good thing that Medicare has removed VAP (Ventilator Acquired Pneumonia) from its proposed no-pay list because otherwise, MICUs everywhere would probably not be able to afford to stay open.
If you’re planning on throwing a “let’s bleed out of our esophagus party” please request that your guests wear raincoats and galoshes.
When all the patients are receiving the same kind of tube feeds, all of their poop smells amazingly identical. And yet your nose treats it as a brand new smell that it must accommodate itself to every single time.
And finally, better that your patient be intubated at the beginning of your shift, rather than the end. Because if it happens at the end of your shift it probably meant that you were spending the whole 12 hours fighting to get your patient intubated.
*No HIPAA – potamuses were harmed in the making of this blog post.